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 Thread: Family Physician |
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Mid-Main Community Health Centre on Main and 24th is awesome! They're also a non-profit organization and have some really great ideas and approaches to health care. I'm assuming everyone there is queer friendly, but I have no idea if anyone is taking new patients. I'd suggest checking out their website and giving them a call if you don't mind commuting from burnaby to vancouver. Otherwise, anything run by Vancouver Coastal is queer friendly. Three Bridges in the downtown core has some pretty good docs. I'm sure there's others, but I can't think of any off the top of my head.
Good luck!
http://www.midmaincommunityhealth.net/
(I'll pm you with a little more info..)
Oh yeah - The Centre used to keep a list of queer friendly health practitioners, but i have no idea if that's still maintained. Another resource might be the "GLBA Business Directory" available most readily around Davie street at The Centre, Little Sister's, etc. It might be called the "Gay and Lesbain Business Directory" or the "Lesbian and Gay Business Directory" or include a longer and more inclusive acronym at this point in time. My most recent copy is from 2006! It should have doctors.. I think. Anyways.. hope that helps!
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| Thread: does anyone even go here? |
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It was never an especially busy board to start with. There was only ever a very small handful of people who actively posted anyways and they're pretty much gone. Facebook and twitter are partly to blame, but moderators who actually start threads, participate and encourage discussion would be nice.
I'm guessing those who still like forums are probably on butch-femme.com or one of the leather boards.
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| Thread: Man or Woman |
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Agreed. I think there should be a lawsuit.
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| Thread: Man or Woman |
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It doesn't bother me that they want to run tests to verify her gender, but it disturbs me greatly that it's being publicized this much. If someone decides to cheat by lying about their gender, then don't you release this information after there's some certainty about the allegation? Do we hear about it every single time someone is being tested for doping? I read something that preliminary tests showed elevated testosterone on par with levels in biomen, but I don't think it's ethical to release this info to the public. Someone from the IAAF even admitted that their handling of this situation, including the release of the preliminary test results, was badly handled.
Theoretically, if someone is born with both male and female physical features (ie. intersex), then where does that leave them in respect to professional sports? (Personally, i think this could be the case with Semenya.) It's not fair to exclude someone when they have no control over their chromosomes, but the common complaint is that it gives someone an unfair advantage over other athletes. So, what to do?
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| Thread: best friends with an ex |
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I so can't do it.
At least it hasn't ever worked out that I've been able to stay friends with ex's. Interestingly enough, it's been for different reasons. An ex breaking some serious and established rules in an open relationship is unforgivable. You might as well be killing kittens. Then there's me still having feelings for an ex long after a break-up and creating an extremely awkward moment which quashed any potential for a friendship on the spot. I'll admit I've subconsciously sabotaged (aka "the wrath of arachnia") the potential for a friendship with an ex in the past. Hurt feelings get in the way when the wounds are still fresh. Seeing someone who is still discovering who they are is fine, but if their ambitions or interests shift so much that after a year you're left with little in common, then there's no point in pursuing a friendship.
Obviously, you look for certain qualities in a friend. So if you broke up and it was unnecessarily messy because of emotional immaturity, then do you really want to be friends with this person? Same goes for commitment issues or poor communication - I need friends to be reliable, loyal and be able to communicate well. Unfortunately some of my exes, at least at the time, didn't demonstrate those qualities. People do change as the years go on, so maybe it's just a matter of time.
How long have you folks who have been successful (in making a friendship work with an ex) had to wait before reshaping that connection into a friendship?
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| Thread: Fucking men. |
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Fucking men, eh? What dy'all think?
There's folks in the community that are judgemental are sincerely feel that if you ID as a "lesbian" (whatever the fuck that's supposed to be), that you can't sleep with men. Somehow you lose lesbian points if you engage in this behavior. So seriously, what do you think of dykes that hook up with biomale cocks?
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| Thread: Choosing the ending |
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Hmmmm, good point! I'm aware of some of these but..
I'm not sure that suicide bombing or kamikazis are condoned fully by a culture. It's supported politically, and arguably religiously, but there's some serious ethical problems with suicide bombing. This may be somewhat a case of semantics, but as far I understand, it's not really considered "suicide." A differentiation is made between suicide, which is a selfish act, and "martyr-bombings" which is done for the benefit of others. I'm honestly not sure to what extent this is supported by predominantly Muslim nations considering there's extensive debate about the interpretation of the Koran. I think you could argue that suicide bombing, a practice only a few decades old, is politically fueled by twisting the Koran to further political agendas and using the nations people as weapons - that's essentially coercing someone to commit suicide.. which is indirectly murder imo, not suicide. But.. that's a pretty heated topic.. hmmmm....
There's also some problems with Sati, namely that women were forced to commit suicide. Isn't this practice illegal?
Even so, these practices don't last very long. Speaking of the middle east, in ancient Egypt the kings were buried with their sacrificed wives, pets, friends, etc. I'm using Ancient Egypt as an example because it's a long lived culture. Relatively speaking, and similarly to all of these practicies, they're short lived and decrease in frequency with time. At least in the case of Ancient Egypt I think it was sparingly practiced in the predynastic and 1st dynasty for roughly a few hundred to a couple of thousand years (don't quote me on that - I'd have to check that out!). Presumably the practiced stopped because a society needs people. The point I'm making is that it's not advantageous to condone sacrifice or suicide, but perhaps that point is lost in modern civilization where the population grows exponentially so much that we're not upset when people we don't know commit suicide - for whatever reason. It's sort of a sad disconnect we have..
Burning monks - didn't know about that one, but I think I have that RATM album! Hmmm... I'll have to think about that.
Culturally subjective practices? There's major moral problems when you adopt cultural relativism as an ethical standpoint.
Self-sacrifice is pretty interesting though. I don't believe people can be completely altruistic in their actions so to me self-sacrifice is always motivated by something else. Then again, what about (for example) a parent who jumps out into traffic to push their child out of the way to save them from being hit by a car, but is killed in the process? I suppose that's suicide without being depressed or out of touch with reality..
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| Thread: Choosing the ending |
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Up for a friendly philosophical debate?
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| Ahh ...it seems the forementioned thoughts would be coming from a person or group of persons who you have never met or heard of then... very interesting. |
Hmmm. It's perfectly valid to argue that knowledge based on experience or so called common knowledge isn't always reliable. That's actually fair. Afterall, I could easily argue (if I was in the 15th century), that the world is flat because I've never heard of anyone traveling all the way around! Great point!
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| The point is not about the person's state of psychosis or depression, if any at all, but rather about choice. Simple. |
The purpose of choosing something is because that thing has a benefit to us. We choose to go to the grocery store to satisfy our hunger. We choose to change our gender because the consequences satisfy our esteem needs and eventually our needs to do with belonging (yes, I know this is over-simplified!). It seems obvious that we choose something because we want the outcome. We can only want the outcome if we know what the outcome is.
So if we don't know what happens after we die, it doesn't make sense to choose suicide. The logical conclusion then: For an agnostic or atheist, it does not make sense to commit suicide.
Let's bring "God/Goddess/Higher Power/etc" into the picture and assume that we know what happens when we die.
My first thought is to challenge you, or anyone, to give a reasonably good definition of God. Afterall, if God exists, then you must be able to at least give some basic description of this being.
My second thought is that I can't think of a culture, living or in the archaeological record, that condoned suicide. Even cultures that practiced human sacrifice did not engage in this practice for a long time or considerably reduced the number of sacrifices over time. The reason is that it's not beneficial to the survival of a society if folks keep committing suicide (or are sacrificed).
Something else that springs to mind: If you know that the afterlife is better than earthly life, then why not commit suicide ASAP?
In general, many religions view time on earth as a time to earn your place in the afterlife (Christianity = earning your place in heaven), or a place where you are meant to learn certain lessons before moving onto the next life. Many religions will say that it's in God's hands to choose when you're ready for an afterlife - not up to the individual. Or perhaps it's up to destiny when you're ready for your next life. Either way, it's not up to you.
Furthermore... Regardless of whether you subscribe to an organized religion or follow a different spiritual path, can you with 100% certainty claim to know what happens after death?
Again, if folks who believe in a higher power could answer yes to the above question, then wouldn't more people be committing suicide?
This is where mental health and terminal illness kicks in. It's only when you feel that life on earth is so unbearably painful that anything but this life must be better, that you start to contemplate suicide. In other words, some individual altered state makes a known mode of existence undesirable enough that an unknown option becomes appealing. Right? Now, if you want a certain outcome, it's not rational to perform an action if you don't know if it'll lead to that certain outcome. The only conclusion to be drawn is that the agent is not rationally thinking. This is why it's a mental health issue. The only exception is when the choice becomes dying in severe pain from terminal illness over the course of a month or dying now and avoiding the pain. Excluding terminal illness, don't we a have an ethical responsibility to protect people who are not rational?
For the sake of argument, if I agree that I do have the right to choose when I die, free of constraint from society, what determines when when I make this decision? Is there an objective measure of what "gathering from this life what I need" means? If we bring God into the argument, then would a divine signal giving me the metaphorical green light be enough?
Thoughts?
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| Thread: sex, casual, looking for it - is no one else? |
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I would, but in my experience women get attached, often hoping a "one week stand" will develop into something deeper regardless of how clear your are about it being a strictly NSA thing. Aside from the usual concerns about STD's, that's probably the biggest draw back for me.
It also takes women, in general, longer to get comfortable enough to engage in casual sex than when it comes to hooking up with dudes. It seems like too much effort, especially when you have a busy schedule.
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| Thread: Choosing the ending |
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I can understand and support someones decision to commit suicide if they have a terminal illness, with absolutely no chance of recovery, and are in severe pain. But..
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Originally posted by Trigger
..and sometimes people just decide that they have gathered from this life what they need and no longer feel the need to be here |
Really? I've never met or heard of anyone who feels this way who isn't either depressed or in a psychosis.
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| Thread: Do dykes have sex with men? |
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Lol! I take it you're a fan of the Discovery channel then? 
In all seriousness, I think some guys are incredibly hot in bed too! Paying for sex - that's an interesting subject in itself. I think queer women who identify as predominantly attracted to other women sleep with men for a variety of reasons. Presumably there's no feelings involved when sex is purely about money, so I'm inclining to think that it wouldn't affect your "position" in terms of a some measure of sexual orientation (whether that measure is internal or external). I suppose Kinsey would be inclined to argue that you drop a notch on his scale - maybe from a 6 (what he defines as exclusively "homosexual") to a 5 (which is defined as predominantly "homosexual" and incidentally heterosexual). Hmmm....
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| Thread: Migration is natural, even if not for everyone |
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| quote: |
Originally posted by Aikio
i doubt Caucasians get offended when asked the same q.
Or should/do they? |
Well, that's not really a fair question because white folks aren't subject to the same high frequency of "where are you from" type questions. In fact, isn't it usually white folks asking the question? Despite what probably is genuine curiosity, each time the question is asked it unfortunately serves to reinforce the status of the dominant group as the norm in society and everyone else who sounds or looks different as the other. It may not necessarily lead to the questioner attributing rank to race and it could even be just an innocent conversation starter. However, I can imagine it must be pretty freakin' annoying to be regularly poked at with the implication that you don't belong.
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| Thread: Oscar Grant Shooting.. |
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The short and sweet version is that Oscar Grant was shot in the back by a cop. There's another video on YouTube that says the cop who shot Grant only had two years experience and a video that is just the shooting without the news commentary. You can see that there's three subjects on the ground. Two are compliant and one even has his hands in the air. In another video on YouTube shown from another angle, you can see that Grant is dragged from a sitting position to face down on the ground by the Oakland police officers. After being thrown onto the ground, possibly resisting, there are two cops on him as well as a third officer within a few feet. There's also a fourth although he appears after the shot is fired and based on other vids it looks like there's 5 cops total. Notice that the officers have the tactical advantage since Grant is face down on the ground, the police outnumber the suspects and Grant is unarmed. A few seconds after they throw Grant onto the ground, a cop pulls his gun out of his holster located at the right side of his tactical belt and fires one shot into the back of Grant. Notice that CPR was not administered.
Any thoughts on the event?
Any thoughts on media coverage? Bias? Public response?
YouTube Link
MercuryNews Article: Protest turns to near riot as hundreds...
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| Thread: The Economy, Business and Investing. |
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I think the US economic crisis obviously has a ripple effect on the global economy, but the local situation while affected by these events is itself an issue that was growing independently of US troubles. For example, the property values have been skyrocketing over the past four years and rent has become ridiculous in Vancouver all long before anything was brewing down south. It's just not sustainable to live in Vancouver. I wish I knew more about the impact of the Olympics in previous host cities because it really worries me how Vancouver is going to manage. The major increases in construction materials alone has had huge consequences.
My job security isn't affected, but one reason my job exists at this time is because of construction indirectly related to the Olympics. I just wonder how much of our job losses are because of the US situation versus because of the Olympics and our unique sustainability issues.
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| Thread: Do dykes have sex with men? |
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My experience has been that it's mostly straight folks who try to impose labels on me...
Indeed, something is inherently wrong with the question "do dykes sleep with men?" Heteronormative binary framework of sexual orientation still seeping into the community?
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| Thread: The Economy, Business and Investing. |
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My job is not affected at all. The extreme dips and spikes in the exchange rate affects us only if we're purchasing equipment, traveling or mailing things. Even then, it's pretty minimal since we're local. What about your job?
I think everyone in the lower mainland is more concerned about the housing market and the Olympics than the US economic crisis.
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| Thread: Do dykes have sex with men? |
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****Reminder: PLAY NICE!****
If you have enough time to respond to that many posts, then you should have enough time to consider whether your delivery is appropriate - there's no need to respond condescendingly or with antagonism. Otherwise valid questions get lost when you're being an ass. This goes for everyone.
And for anyone who isn't clear on this... Obviously, sarcasm doesn't translate well into cyberspace so don't be surprised when people don't get it or when you get flak in return. 
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| Thread: New Years Eve |
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I ended up going out to Score and then fell asleep probably just before 1am.
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| Thread: Friends |
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Hmmm... but then you gotta change the cat litter. Then again, sometimes shoveling cap poop every day is easier than getting involved in a relationship. Um, I have no idea where I was going with this!
Well, if you're up at SFU by any chance I could always use some new buddies on campus. I'm also committed (in a relationship, not an institution) so I'm pretty drama free. Point is, there's plenty of folks out there with good intentions and without ulterior motives. I think you just need more time to bounce back from what sounds like a crappy experience and place to vent.
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